A Banner Day for Blogging...

How to tell you are going to have a wacky day.

I have had the gallery open for 12 minutes so far today and already I have had two complete loony tunes in here.

What the Hell? Is the Circus in town? The Special Hospital having another field trip?

*****

ATTENTION ALL WANNA BE ARTISTS!

Before you go around to galleries telling them you're an artist and wanting them to show your work...GET A FUCKING CLUE!

Pardon my language.

You people are making me crazy. How can you call yourself an artist when you know absolutely nothing about art. The fact that you slop some form of pigment on a surface for a few minutes every once in a while does not an artist make.

Something that almost always tips me off that you are a nut job, is that you come into the gallery and the first thing you say is that you are an artist. 95% of the time you're wrong. Heres how I know you're wrong.

1) An artist doesn't try to tell me that a work is more valuable than another just because of the medium. An oil is not necessarily worth more than an acrylic or vice versa. It has to do with the quality of the work and the artists reputation.

2) An artist doesn't try to tell me that prints have no value or that real artists would never make prints. Artists from the dawn of time have made prints in one form or another. Need I remind you about the Warhol that just sold for $71 million. It was a print.

3) An artist will not ask me how long it took to create a work. It takes a life time. No one wakes up and thinks, "I'm going to be a painter today..." and starts cranking out masterpieces. It takes years of practice and dedication to get to the where they are. Yes it may only take them a few hour now but it was decades of practice to get to that point.

4) An artist will not ask me for "The Price Book". Meaning, they think that there is a volume of every artist and every work ever created that lists the price of said work. As much as some people think it may be, the art world is not SEARS. There is no catalog or Price Book. OMG, it would be a mile thick and have to be updated every ten minutes.

And just in case you were wondering, I have heard all four of these things this morning . Oh it's going to be a good day for art, I can tell.




4 comments:

Dave2 said...

Yes.

Reminds me of the time I was doing an installation and had somebody come up to me and ask if I was the artist. When I told them I was, they rambled on about how they love art so much that they decided to become an art investor. They then went on to tell me about all the magnificent pieces in their collection...

... all painted by Thomas Kinkade, Painter of Shite.

I give up.

Anonymous said...

I may be a little off center - but probably not a looney tune, I'll let you decide. Just stopping by - nice blog. Lady Rose

Sizzle said...

"the art world isn't Sears"- ha!

sounds like they let the freaks out.

eclectic said...

See? The Secret Silver Lining in Every Bad or Wack Experience: it provides blog fodder!!!

So now, wasn't it just a little while ago that someone else was all confused about Dr. Suess' work? Maybe you should put up a sign saying, "Dr. Suess produced works of visual art unconnected to his works of literature and illustrative art. If you have trouble accepting the concept, perhaps you'd like the Kincade gallery just over on the next street."

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