1997 was the worst year of my recorded history. 2008 is second worst. It was close, but it's still only second. 2009 is shaping up to give 2008 a run for it's position.
For about a month I rambled on about dream jobs to the point that even I was tired of hearing about it. Now five months later, I see things a bit differently. I love what I do. As far as jobs go, it is a dream, but it's not what I dream about.
The universe is full of sick and twisted jokes, that I have missed the punch line for. I guess my dream is one of them.
The thing I dream about most of all, is being a great dad. I know, I can't believe that after everything, that is what I dream about most. And now, it's my 'dream job' that's keeping me from what I really want.
I'm now spending 50 to 60 hours a week at the gallery, and I only get to spend about 20 hours a week with my son. To me, being great, means spending as much time with him as I can. We pay strangers to watch and spend time with him because we work. To give him a better life. To pay them, we have to work more. Working more we spend less time with him.
So, I spent the last twenty years, working my ass off so I would have more time to spend with my wife and now, child. Just as I was getting where I was headed, the world collapses around us and I find myself having to basically start over. Working my ass off so I can be where I was twenty years ago.
No matter how long I sit and think about it, I just don't see the humor.