Dark Days...

Once , I met someone that changed my life. From that point on, the world was a different color.  The black cloud that followed me was gone. Sunshine filled my life.

The thing about sunshine is that even the smallest cloud can blot it out.

When you spend so much time with a dark cloud following you. And then you are surrounded by sunshine, it's easy to get hooked on the light. It's  an amazing change of pace. Then on the days when the sunshine is hiding behind a cloud you really miss it.  You get used to it being there. It's easy to forget what life was like when every day was cloudy and dark.

When you love sunshine, the dark days seem so much darker.

My Greatest Fear...

The heart and emotions are funny things. Logic seldom plays a part in these matters. At least in my world. Love is what rules my life. More than anything else, I need someone to love, and someone that loves me. To hold and touch and kiss and...to keep loving. Today, tomorrow, always.

I have never really been able to make decisions with my head. Logic and common sense always go out the window. My heart jumps in. Emotions swirl about like a hurricane. Sparks fly and I lose control. All logic goes out the window.

I have tried several times to not follow love. Make more sensible choices. Love seldom lasts forever. One person, along the journey, changes their views. There needs change. There wants and desires change. Love fades. Sometimes it tries to changes and adapt. Sometimes things are just broken and can't be fixed.

At one point both halves of a couple are eager and excited to spend time together. Get to know the other persons secrets. What happens when there are no more secrets? What happens when the excitement dims? When the sparks no longer fly?

Love leaves us vulnerable. In order to love you have to be able to let down your walls and your guard. You have to open yourself up to unimaginable pain. Because with great pleasure comes great pain. In my life, love has always ended in great pain. It has almost always been worth it.

In the times of pain I swear I will never love again. I promise myself that I will never let my guard down. Never let anyone in as close again. Never let anyone else know all of your secrets. To never be vulnerable.

I have finally discovered that my greatest fear is not being alone, it's being vulnerable.

Sparks...

They worked together. Saw each other every day for the most part. Smiles and eye batting. The occasional wink. She was hot and he was flattered. It was fun and innocent.

One day they were standing beside each other. He turned to say hello. Their eyes met, they held the gaze. Then she said, "You have the most beautiful eyes." he was positive that when she said it that her eyes sparkled. Like you see in the movies. a little spark of sunshine glistened in her eyes. he could almost hear the ting sound that goes with it. His pulse doubled, he took in a quick deep breath, and very softly said,

"Thank you." as he continued to look at her. Lost in her gaze. It was over in a second. They got interrupted and each went about their day.

He couldn't stop thinking about what he had seen. It was a spark. Her eyes sparkled.

Complications...

noun     a circumstance that complicates something; a difficulty: there is a complication concerning ownership of the site.• an involved or confused condition or state: to add further complication, English speakers use a different name.

"to add further complication..."
That's my personal favorite. 
As if you already had just enough complications, to add further, would just be too much?How much complication is enough? Is there a complications limit a person can hit, or do we just keep piling it on? Do we have to work through each complication before they go away or will some of them just fade away on their own?
"to add further complication, the spark has ignited a fire..."
Well, here's to further complications.

Long Live The Batch Of '92...All Hail The Batch Of '13

Just for the record, and a little back story...I, in general, do not like potato salad. I do like potatoes, in a wide variety of forms and presentations. My problem with potato salad, is that no one knows how to make a good potato salad. 

Almost always they have way, way too much mayo. Or worse, Miracle Whip. yuk! Too much mustard is a common problem. Too lumpy, too dry, too bland, too crazy with wild ingredients. Anywhoo...I come from a long line of potato salad makers and eaters. My mother, grand mother, aunts(men in my family don't really cook) they all made their own version. They were all very proud but they just weren't quite right.

So when I took to teaching myself to cook in the mid to late 80's, one of my goals was to create the ultimate potato salad recipe. I too wanted to be able to enjoy what seemed to be an American tradition. Every holiday there was a potato salad of some sorts available. The grocery stores carry large tubs of the stuff for every day sale. The deli's across the country all have some type of potato salad available to the public.

I have tried hundreds of potato salads. Hundreds! And with out fail, 95% of them have been disappointing. 

It was in the year 1992, that after countless attempts at becoming the Potato Salad King of the West Coast. (claiming Salad Superiority over all west of the Mississippi) that I finally succeeded. The greatest batch of tater salad that had ever been created to that point in time had been made. It was heralded across the west as not just a salad but a master work of art. A meal unto itself. A joy to the senses.

From that point on, every batch of tater salad has been held up the standard of '92. But seeing as how tater salad making is not an exact science, each batch has it's own unique qualities that make a replica of '92 near impossible. At best they would be a pale comparison. No mater how good the current attempts, they would some how fall short of expectations. It was a common urban legend that the batch of '92 was a myth. That it didn't really exist, but it was rather a cruel joke played on tater salad lovers every where. Get there hopes up with dreams of '92 and then dash them away with some runny substandard store bought. 

Well kids, I hope you are all sitting down. Catch your breath. Wait for it.....

May I introduce, all of civilized humanity west of the Mississippi, to thee, "Batch of"13"

'13

It has been done. It has been talked about for 21 years. Whispered about, no one daring to speak loudly as some one might hear talk of a challenge to the '92. No one would risk such ridicule. For surely, no one would attempt such a feet as to better the '92.

All except I. Yes, I, the creator of the now infamous batch of '92. For with every attempt, I think to myself that this could be it. This next batch could be the one that comes out of no where and takes the crown as the Greatest Batch of Tater Salad since the Batch of '92.

But on this day, not  only do I claim that this batch, the Batch of "13 is not only as good as the Batch of "92, but is better, than the legendary batch. Thus making this batch, The Batch of "13, the greatest batch of Tater Salad every created west of the Mississippi.

Hail the Batch of "13!

A perfect combination of flavors, textures, aromas...A culinary master work that shall live on through time as the greatest batch of tater salad ever created. No longer a side dish, for this potato salad can be eaten as a meal. Sides be dammed. From this day forward, all potato salads everywhere(west of the Mississippi) shall be held to this standard. For this is the perfection that all salad makers aspire to be. Marvel in the magnificence that shall for ever be referred to as...

The Batch Of '13.......


For those of you that would like to know what went into the batch of '13. Here is an ingredient list. However portions are a mystery as I create by taste and touch. Sorry.


russet potatoes
celery - small dice
yellow onion - small dice
hard boiled eggs
apple wood smoked bacon, cooked medium so it's still meaty
garlic jalapeno mustard
real mayonnaise
pickle relish
pepper corn blend - ground
sea salt - ground
garlic powder
cayenne pepper
red pepper flakes
season salt
dill