31 May 2008

Really, We Don't Know This?

The following article was on MSN this morning. I have to say, that ever time I read an article about fathers, or men in general, it makes men sound like knuckle dragging morons. Are most men really so un-evolved that they need to be told these things? Do men really think that parenting is for the women? Do men still believe that we can't be nurturing, emotional, and care giving? Hell, do men even know what common decency is anymore?

From articles like this one below, it makes me wonder.

Well men, let me say that it's time we join the 21st century. Women are great and all, but it's time for us, and by us, I mean you, to step up. We can and should be equally involved in relationships and parenting. Stop dragging your knuckles. There is nothing better or more important than being a good parent and partner. It's good for us individually and good for us as a society. Life is about more than Bud, Nascar and porn. Don't make me pull this blog over.

*****

1. Respect Your Children's Mother
If you are married, keep your marriage strong and vital. If you're not married, it is still important to respect and support the mother of your children. When children see their parents respecting each other, they are also more likely to feel that they are also accepted and respected.

2. Spend Time with Your Children
How a father spends his time tells his children what's important to him. If you always seem too busy for your children, they will feel neglected, no matter what you say. Treasuring children often means sacrificing other things, but it is essential to spend time with your children.

3. Earn the Right to Be Heard
All too often, the only time a father speaks to his children is when they have done something wrong. Begin talking with your kids when they are young, so that difficult subjects will be easier to handle as they get older. Take time and listen to their ideas and problems.

4. Discipline with Love
All children need guidance and discipline, not as punishment, but to set reasonable limits. Remind your children of the consequences of their actions and provide meaningful rewards for desirable behavior. Fathers who discipline in a calm and fair manner show love for their children.
5. Be a Role Model
Fathers are role models to their kids, whether they realize it or not. A girl who spends time with a loving father grows up knowing she deserves to be respected by boys. Fathers can teach sons what is important in life by demonstrating honesty, humility and responsibility.

6. Be a Teacher
Too many fathers think teaching is something others do. But a father who teaches his children about right and wrong, and encourages them to do their best, will see his children make good choices. Involved fathers use everyday examples to help their children learn the basic lessons of life.

7. Eat Together as a Family
Sharing a meal together can be an important part of healthy family life. In addition to providing some structure in a busy day, it gives kids the chance to talk about what they are doing and want to do. It is also a good time for fathers to listen and give advice.

8. Read to Your Children
Children learn best by doing and reading, as well as seeing and hearing. Begin reading to your children when they are very young. When they are older, encourage them to read on their own. Instilling your children with a love for reading is one of the best ways to ensure they will have a lifetime of personal and career growth.

9. Show Affection
Children need the security that comes from knowing they are wanted, accepted and loved by their family. Parents need to feel both comfortable and willing to hug their children. Showing affection every day is the best way to let your children know that you love them.

10. Realize That a Father's Job Is Never Done
Even after children are grown and ready to leave home, they will still look to their fathers for wisdom and advice. Fathers continue to play an essential part in the lives of their children as they grow and, perhaps, marry and build their own families.

8 comments:

Pumpkin Pie said...

I think most men don't help in parenting and don't give their wives the consideration that they deserve.

But, I hate to generalize.

I love reading your blog because you are a great role model for all men out there!

Mad William said...

Pumpkin,

Thank you. That is one of the nicest things I have ever been told.

Nat said...

It's one of my pet peeves that the media often portray men as knuckle dragging morons. My experience has shown that while, it's true, there are some men like that. There are also many women undeserving of the title of mother, who honestly take advantage of their men.

Great list, here's to good parenting!

Sizzle said...

Thanks for posting this. I am not married and I am not yet a mother but these things are very important to me. It's really very inspiring to see men like you who actually DO these things. Thank you for that!

Mad William said...

nat,

I agree. Although this post was a generalization of men. The media does nothing to support men evolving. There are plenty of women that are horrible parents and partners as well. The media seldom mentions that.


sizzle,

Thank you very much.
It is a great list, too bad people(men and women) don't know this already.

eclectic said...

Well, perhaps the "information" in the article is "news" to some individuals, but with very few exceptions, I believe the modern "father" image is not what it was a generation or so ago. In fact, most relationships I see seem to run along a far more egalitarian model than what the media portrays. Which, in my opinion, is as it should be. Yay for evolving, eh?

Penelope said...

Wonderful!
As much as it loaths me to say it, my ex can be a total twat on occasions but he is a very good Dad, just a lousy husband ;o)
(I still may print this and highlight a few points just for his reference!)

Footsteps said...

Mr. Man is a very blessed little boy to have a dad like you.